Finding Peace

As I search for Alana, feeling angry at myself for doing those things that cannot be moral, I find myself starting to forgive, but not forget. Because, if I allow myself to continue this path of rage, I will be just as bad as her. I’d be the jury and the judge in a trial that only exists inside of my anger. I think that blogging my thoughts has really helped me with


Photo by Moyan Brenn ©2012 CC BY 2.0

everything that’s happened. I can’t help but feel trapped when I’m forced to say my feelings out loud, writing or typing things are less judgmental than real people. I don’t understand why I was picked for this path in life, hell, I can’t imagine what I did that was so dreadful so that God would pick this path for me. Killing off the people I care most about, making my heart feel this way–the feeling of rejecting your true feelings over and over again because at the time it seemed like the worse possible thing that could happen to you. But it didn’t just happen to you, you soon realize. You were born to feel this way, to love this way, and started to feel self-accepted first. Yet, God had blessed you with homophobic parents with dreams of you bringing home a woman and having grandchildren. They said that directly to me in front of my boyfriend, my boyfriend whom I brought home to them to meet and accept.


Photo by Prachatai ©2014 CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

I type this in a computer lab in a small city not far from the crash site. The rest who lived were still mourning in a hotel room, sitting in silence, I assume. I thought the same way, just sitting around until I finally die, but instead I decided to get up and write. Not for the fame, not for the views, but for myself. I’m not sure of how much more I can take, it’s been over 3 years since this all started, non-stop adrenaline pumping. The adrenaline barely makes an impact anymore, it just feels numb, dull, as if there’s a screen and I can only feel what pushes the screen, nothing more. I wish to bring justice to those who we lost, Brad, Tiffano, and Justine… But I do not wish to murder her just for my selfish reason of revenge. I don’t want to murder her at all. I want to turn her to the justice system, and then whatever happens to her from then on is no longer my problem. No longer our problem. I’ll find a way, soon.



I bet you thought you had seen the last of me. Yeah, well, I thought so too. The second we landed on Earth I had made a run for it. Some stupid, irrational part of me had this crazy thought: If I acted normal, Alana would leave me alone. Obviously, I was out of my mind. Luckily, Kail grabbed me and pulled me back to the rest of the group. As soon as we got all of our things together, we heard someone calling our names. It was Justine. She was in her private jet, waving to bring us over.

Only a idiot would have followed her. Or a group of desperate teenagers. Alana had just landed, 50 feet away, in full Shrek form. Justine’s private jet seemed heaven sent. We pprivate-jetiled in and with a knock on the cockpit door from Justine,
we were off, leaving Alana in the dust.

Flying away from where we landed was like taking a breath after being submerged under water for an eternity. It was the first time in a while that none of us were panicked or, in Brad’s case, crying. We sat down in Justine’s luxurious chairs and many of us passed out from exhaustion. We were finally experiencing peace, however short our rendezvous with peace may be. As my companions sleep, I am here, writing, putting my thoughts into this blog, now that I have the time. I don’t know when I will next be able to do this, seeing as Alana may just never stop.

Justine’s pilot has just turned on the speakers, possibly to announce that we have arrived in a secret hiding place.

“Justine,” he said, “I see something flying behind us.

Kail ran into the cockpit to look at the screen. I leaned forward to catch a glimpse, myself.


I passed Kail as I ran into the cockpit and he ran out. It was with a panicked look on his face. He sat down in the first available seat, next to Brad, and put his head between his knees. I stayed in the cockpit, watching. It has now been forty minutes of nothing but us flying at full speed and Alana keeping up behind us, no effort from her. It seems this will simply be a race of who can last longer. I had sat down in the copilot seat and am now attempting to start up writing again. Maybe I should just take one more loobvfhidszdjk ivjfdnc



Perhaps I should explain what happened then. It has been two weeks since the accident. Only now have I just remembered that this blog exists, and that I need to tell the world of Alana’s crimes. I had just looked up to the screen, when I saw Shreklana open her mouth. From it, came a gigantic missile, that crashed into the plane. My head had smashed into the keys from the impact, and I had blacked out. It must have only been for a couple seconds, but I came to with blood in my eyes and alarms and screams all around. I managed to stumble into the main area to take in the sight around me. Brad and Kail were holding each other, Justine was hugging Brandon, despite not knowing him at all. Both were screaming. Tiffano and Alex were each on opposite sides of the plane, huddled up in little balls in between seats. All this, I saw in an instant. I turned back around, to find the pilot. Dead. The ground couldn’t have been more than a hundred feet away. In my panic, I pushed the pilot aside, and somehow managed to keep us from being completely crushed against the ground. By some twisted mercy of the gods, we were headed to an empty field. I got the plane horizontal. We hit the ground. I was pitched all the way to the back of the plane. Hitting the wall, everything went dark for the second time in a few minutes.

I opened my eyes to see Brandon staring back at me. Except he wasn’t. His eyes were open, but Brandon was not looking. Him and Justine were slumped against each other, each eternally captivated by something the rest of us would not see until we met them again. I backed away, and hit Kail’s leg. I glanced up to see him sobbing. It was Brad, his eyes closed in the dreamless sleep, never to open again. Tiffano and Alex emerged from where they hid, and we all gathered around Kail, me on the floor, Tiffano and Alex standing, and Kail, crouched over the motionless shell that once was Brad.

These are the crimes of the woman named Alana. Forget her invasion of privacy, forget that Justine was a nuisance. The deaths of four people were her crimes. The death of the pilot, whose name I never knew, the deaths of Justine, Brandon, and Brad. They are her crimes. They are the reason she deserves, no, needs to be punished.

Looking Back

Oh dear lord. What a journey this has been. A long, difficult, and downright unbelievable journey, if you ask me. It’s also one that I am ready to end. At all costs. This is the journey of Fake Implants.

We began in a library. It was a normal day, or as normal as it got in high school. Things were finally beginning to look up for me. I had my perfect GPA, extracurriculars stacked to the roof, and was even tutoring someone. But the girl, the one sitting in the back corner of the library, she ruined it all. Granted, my student wasn’t exactly the teacher’s dream either. Justine was the incarnation of a pink, blonde, nightmare. What I wouldn’t give to be as careless with my grades, my reputation and my life as she. Actually, I would


Photo Gord Webster 2/14/12 © CC BY-SA 2.0

Justine will be with nothing but her bright pink lipstick. The one who I actually wouldn’t mind switching places with (for the time being) was my classmate, Kail. He was currently lazily wandering through the shelves and aisles, browsing books to his heart’s content. Instead, I waited until the day my air-headed student deigned to make my acquaintance. As I said: I lived a relatively normal life.


When Justine entered the room, I felt everything go down the drain. Not my hard work or my future, not yet, but the quality of my day. A superficial thing, now that I think about it. Justine had serious problems with focus, and that was when the nightmare began. She had noticed Kail in an aisle near our table. Of course you all know what happened next. Justine


Photo Brockovich 3/10/10 © CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

had always considered flirting her “fortissimo.” I kid you not, she actually mixed up forte and fortissimo.  Ok no need to get nerdy on a shared blog. Justine actually began chasing Kail up and down the bookcase aisles. At this point, I couldn’t take any more. I had better things to do with my time than to watch a child play around. What happened next I would not be able to tell you. All that I know is that evil snake blogger Alana documented it all. She e-mailed the link to me the very next day. Somehow, it had gotten into the post that Justine was a man, Kail liked men, and that Alana was Shrek. At that moment, I knew that my life as I knew it was over until this crisis was resolved.

All I wanted, was to eat my lunch in peace. I was having lunch with Kail and the new kid, Tiffano, one day. We were in the back of the lunch hall, unnoticed by almost everyone. And I say almost because the very people we were trying to avoid found us. Justine came first.


Photo Mike Mozart 3/9/14 © CC BY 2.0

She sauntered over, planting herself across from Kail. Due to her utter stupidity and overall lack of brain cells, Justine threw a Cheez-It at Kail that ended up hitting Tiffano. Apparently, Tiffano had an allergic reaction specifically to Cheez-Its. Her face swelled and turned green. Literally. Tiffano turned into Pepe the Frog. Unknown to us, at the time, Alana watched this all and put it right onto her blog. Like the plague, she, once again, sent me the link to her blog post, this time with an audio message of her maniacal laughter in the background.

It seemed that our only escape was away from the planet. Now, that may have been a bit of an overreaction, but Kail and Tiffano convinced me that escape into space was our only option. As we loaded the ship, a couple guys ran up, begging us to allow them to escape. They, too, had been terrorized by Alana, and wanted nothing more than solace. We arrived at the shelter and were able to relax for some time. Some. Before long, Alana arrived. This c038c021-f9cc-45ea-bd3e-1bd07390bdc1time, she was also bringing a clueless Justine in tow. We were completely lost, but the brave Tiffano decided he would take one for the team. He ripped open the cupboards and grabbed a box of Cheez-Its from within. Shoving a handful into his mouth, Tiffano went to greet our guests. The rest of us ran frantically to the basement and out to our ship, not wanting Tiffano’s sacrifice to be in vain. This escape plan was an utter disaster. We only barely managed to get Tiffano onto the ship before Alana and Justine rushed out to try to catch us. Looked like we evaded them for the first time.

I think these people are completely mental. I need to be done with this nonsense and get back to my life. My boring, routine life. At least there was consistency and no fearing for your life. In fact, I have a couple projects due soon and I cannot afford to waste any more time. Time is a short thing is this world and in my life, especially with Alana after my friends and I every other day. But no more. If she comes, I will fight her. Because I have really wanted to read this new book I bought and watch a documentary I found (called From the 50 Yard Line.)I can’t do that with Alana on my back. I have a life, with AP classes, college apps, and marching band. That is reality. Not some crazy adventure with bloggers and teenage drama queens. Bye bye escaped convict lifestyle, hello, normality.




This is no longer a crazy blogger. She is a murderer.

I was fine with Alana, I thought she was just a person who was obsessed with the typical high school gang. If it weren’t for her, I probably would’ve never met Brad, Brandon, Alex, and so many more people who I created such close bonds with. But all that changed. She is no longer just a crazy blogger with an obsession. She’s a murderer, a stalker, a terrorist.

Brad was one of us. He didn’t talk much, or do anything really significant in the short amount of time that I knew him, but he was really one of us. We all shared the same laughs, the same tiffs, the same problems. That day was a short one, we were on our way to Thailand on Justine’s private jet. We, the gang, were headed on our way there to live happy lives in peace. The world did not deserve Brad, he was a good person…too good for this world.

It was terrifying to know that you were going to die. To know that in the back of your mind, that not everyone in your friend group were going to survive that day. The plane was shaking violently, brad and I were sitting next to each other when it was going down. His face was the last one I saw before it went down and I blacked out. I squeezed his hand as hard as I could, telling him


Photo by Miikka H 2010© CC BY-SA 2.0

that we’ll both make it out alive, telling him that it’ll all be okay. I didn’t even get to see who else was around me, it was only me focusing on his face. His face was sheer terror and worry, which broke my heart. Either I die, he dies, or we both die.

I shut my eyes so tightly that I don’t remember what happened before the plane hit the ground. But when I opened them, my heart shattered in a million pieces. The sight…. The sight I saw when I opened them, Brad’s grip was no longer there. I immediately checked for his heartbeat, for his breath. Nothing. He looked peaceful, his eyes closed softly. I got up, checked for others, hoping, hoping so hard that someone else would be alive. I yelled, screamed, sobbed so loudly, I had lost the people I held dear to me. I lost my family, rejecting me because I was gay. These were the only people left. Linhy, Alex, and Tiffano put a hand on my shoulder, and we stayed there for a moment. We lost Justine. We lost Brandon. We lost Brad. But no one has seen Alana yet, surely she had survived.


Photo by Play Your Place 2013© CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

I was mourning, my family was broken. Why would she want to kill her best subjects? The only reason why her fame exists? I can’t possibly understand why… I’m angry, angry at the fact she has killed them, they would all have been alive if not for her. We would live happy, free lives out of her hair. We would be neighbors, we would live next to each other just like we planned. Exactly like we planned. We were so close, yet so far. I was angry, we all were. Blinded by rage, we all understood what we had to do. It was fine with the crazy rumors, even if it seemed like the worst thing in the world at the time. But nothing could compare to this.

She took our reputations, she took our homes, she took our families, she took some of our lives. What have we done to deserve such punishment, I asked myself. Just wondering, trying to understand why all of us, had deserved such pain and suffering inflicted so early in our lives. Forgive me, for this will weigh heavy on my conscience and my soul, but Alana will pay for the lives of our friends, of our family. I will not lose anymore of those who I hold dear to me, those who accept me for who I truly am. Alana will pay. This is war.


Photo by Moyan Brenn 2012© CC BY 2.0


Goodbye Alana.


I honestly don’t know what I was expecting. You may have heard from Kail, but Alana caught up to us, and we really should have seen that coming. That girl is a monster. Literally.

Outside the window of our hideout, we could see Alana emerge from the new rocket ship with Justine. We reacted immediately, all running to the basement as Tiffano pulled a box of Cheez-Its from the cupboard.

In case it slipped your mind, Tiffano has a severe allergy to Cheez-Its, the only symptom being her transformation into Pepe the Frog.

He was able to distract Alana as I got everyone else into the ship.

We were in, and, leaving the door open, I began to start up the engine, preparing to get us out. Tiffano/Pepe made an honorable sacrifice and it was up to him to get back to the ship before we took off.

And out he came, right when we were about to lift off, he sprinted out the back door, full Pepe form. The second he jumped into the ship and we took off, Alana bursted through the back door of our hideout. Or, it was what I assumed was Alana. It was this huge ogre creature, something that looked like it came straight from a movie.

Looks like I need to catch up on sleep.

Hello! Good Gossip Here!

Hey, EVERYONE! It’s me, Kail. Yes, I’m the one you’ve heard about. Anyways, I’ve got the whole gang here with me, we’ve escaped the dreaded Alana, she had found our bomb shelter on the moon. We did our best to manage, but it was a close call. She almost caught us! Who knows what she was going to do once she caught us. Here’s what happened. We were just chilling, you know, hanging out in our hideout, when we hear a rocket ship land. We thought maybe it was ONLY Justine, but WE WERE DEAD WRONG. Luckily, we had a plan. Tiffano eats a Cheez-It and distracts Alana. Linhy, leads us all to the rocket ship, and figures out how to drives the thing, and I just stare dreamily…dreamily at Linhy….I’M NOT GAY… Back to my point, We all boarded, Tiffano getting out at the last second. Linhy heads straight for Earth. We were just about ready to go when, I saw one last jaw-dropping thing… ALANA IS SHREK. E-X-P-O-S-E-D.

We Made It


God, being on the run is exhausting. The air here is so thin I can feel my brain cells dying, my IQ deteriorating. This must be where Justine spends her off time.

Tiffano landed the ship a couple hours ago and the two of us, along with Kail, Brandon, Brad and Alex are now taking refuge in the bunker. (Brandon, Brad and Alex are a few guys who had also been previously terrorized by Alana.)

At least I brought my reading material, I have to finish reading The Odyssey for my English class and I cannot fall behind. Hiding from a crazed blogger or not. Sitting in the kitchen of our bunker was a great place to get ahead so that I could deal with anything coming later. Unfortunately, five other guys in a room do not make for a great reading environment, especially for something as foreign to me as The Odyssey. That needs at least a little concentration, of which I would never be able to get if I had stayed in the kitchen.

Thankfully, a fully equipped bunker will always have multiple rooms. After a bit of exploring, I found one at the back at the bunker containing nothing but a single couch. Perfect.

So here I am, jotting down some notes before I settle down for reading. We have lost Alana, for now. I wonder how long it will be until we have to be on the move again.

They’re Coming.


Oh God no. We are on a freaking rocketship. How the hell are they following us? You know, Alana is probably still laughing her butt off at us, just waiting to get her hands on a story. At least she won’t have any material for the time being. Perhaps she will become bored and turn around. Or, even better, accidentally drive her ship into the darkness of space, never to be heard from again. I desperately hope for the latter, however, EVEN THE FORMER WOULD BE A GOD GIVEN GIFT. At the moment, Kail looks panicked. He is on the space couch, nervously glancing out the window, as if he can spot the other ship. I, myself, only know from the call that I got from Alana, featuring only a prolonged, cackling laugh. From that, I knew. I cut off the connection before she could say any more. I was horrified. When will we ever be able to escape the Wicked Witch?



secret-agent-on-whiteWOW! I can’t believe it actually worked! I have befriended Justine, and GUESS WHAT! I’m on my way to the moon! Who knew that rockets had wi-fi? Anyways, the trip should take about 2-3 days, but I’m all good, I’ve got wi-fi and food, what else do I need? Justine may get her head taken off in a few hours though…She is really starting to get on my nerves by blasting Gossip Girl through her Netflix account. I guess that’s one thing we have in common…WE LOVE DRAMA! Currently, I’m wondering about what I’m going to find when I get up there… I don’t know… Kail is up there with a whole group of guys…Gay people to me are just…ugh! Who can agree with me?? But I doubt that anyone comes out as straight these days. ANYWAYS MY DONKEYS, I will update you on a BIG story after this is all over! STAY TUNED!

Alana Will Be the Death of Me.

Apparently, there exists a certain individual going by the name of “Alana.” I have been informed that this woman has been blogging about myself along with others who have caught her attention. What makes it worse, Justine has recently been feeding her information about us, so that Alana can generate even more blog posts for her idiotic following. Justine is simply an imbecile, hankering for popularity and friends, achieving her ambition through any means possible. I have had enough. It seems time to leave and go into hiding. I will allow for Kail and Tiffano to escape with me, if they would like, for they have been victimized by Alana and Justine as well. I pray to every one of the hundreds of gods watching that neither Alana or Justine will reach us in the place where we are going. Should that happen, there will be no salvation for any of us. I had tried to keep the whereabouts of my hideout a secret, however it was obviously impossible. Alana is already aware of my destination. It is my hope and prayer that she will have no means to reach it.